When I first met my good friend's soon-to-be-husband, he wanted my opinion on a question. He was very serious, earnest. "When you put toothpaste on your toothbrush, do you squeeze from the middle or push up from the end of the tube?" Apparently as they prepared for the wedding and a life together, the issue of toothpaste etiquette had come up again and again. He was convinced it was a non-option, one was considerate, efficient, frugal, and the other- barbaric.
He leaned forward, shoulders slightly hunched, eyes wide, eager to see if I would add a tally to his side if the argument. "Well, I can tell you what I do out of habit, personally. But first, the truth is, if this is an issue, I'd have two tubes of toothpaste. They aren't expensive and don't take up too much space. It isn't worth trying to convince your partner to change. There are bigger issues for compromise and persuasion in a relationship."
He elaborated on why he thought squeezing from the end was a no brainer. I wish I could remember more of why he felt this was an important issue or if he connected it symbolically to something larger in their building their life together. I can't. Their wedding was beautiful, my friend having added small details reflecting parts of their relationships I hadn't been able to witness from afar. Even more touching was during the event I saw components acknowledging with love and reverence the union of not just them but their two families.
A decade later, I think it is unlikely she has changed her toothpaste squeezing ways but they have built something lasting in spite of it.
— slowjamr
He leaned forward, shoulders slightly hunched, eyes wide, eager to see if I would add a tally to his side if the argument. "Well, I can tell you what I do out of habit, personally. But first, the truth is, if this is an issue, I'd have two tubes of toothpaste. They aren't expensive and don't take up too much space. It isn't worth trying to convince your partner to change. There are bigger issues for compromise and persuasion in a relationship."
He elaborated on why he thought squeezing from the end was a no brainer. I wish I could remember more of why he felt this was an important issue or if he connected it symbolically to something larger in their building their life together. I can't. Their wedding was beautiful, my friend having added small details reflecting parts of their relationships I hadn't been able to witness from afar. Even more touching was during the event I saw components acknowledging with love and reverence the union of not just them but their two families.
A decade later, I think it is unlikely she has changed her toothpaste squeezing ways but they have built something lasting in spite of it.
— slowjamr
You gave an excellent, Solomon-like answer to the guy, but it sounds like he wanted validation rather than a solution! Glad this couple is still going strong! (Macoff, fellow Dipper)
ReplyDeleteFor more than thirty years we have shared a toothpaste. Then, I tested positive for Covid and our adult children accused me of trying to kill their dad because I wasn’t in quarantine. I started using my own tube of toothpaste and now we have separate tubes.I really enjoyed this story.
ReplyDeleteGreat story as a couple bring their stories, their I've always done it this way; who doesn't?, and their "must-haves" into one shared household.
ReplyDelete